Not For Miyako Fans
by Ichijouji-Tiana
Summary: I wrote this story in clear defiance of Kenyako. If you're a major Miyako/Kenyako fan- and you DON'T have a sense of humour- this story is NOT for you.


Hunched in a sick and twisted position all her own, in the corner of my room sat Inue Miyako. Purple-haired and quite freaky, I must add, she chewed slowly on the skulls of rats.

"Gee, Miyako, when I agreed to let you stay here for a week I didn't expect you to be that... uh... weird. I expected you to be more up-beat and happy like on TV," I said quietly, as I did agreed to let her stay with my family for a week while hers was vacationing in Cuba.

Of course, who would want to bring something so freakish, so utterly insane with them to Cuba? I would die of embarrassment if this... this THING was my sister. Luckily, being an only child, no one had to know of the 'person' that was staying with me.

"You want me to be happy, eh, Tiana? Happy? As in bunnies and love happy? Yeah right. Once Ken admitted his secret HATE for me I was cast away like I wasn't important. Even Hikari stopped talking to me. Our Digimon refuse to jogress. Speaking of my Digimon, Hawkmon hasn't been able to look at me since Wormon broke contact with him," Miyako muttered as she rocked back and forth slowly in her corner.

"That doesn't give you much reason to be a baka," I responded flatly.

"BAKA O MIRU! (I feel like a fool)!" she shouted, suddenly standing, dropping the shrine of rat skeletons that rested upon her lap.

I cringed. I could barely stand those things in my room, let alone all over my carpet. She grabbed my hand and pulled me into a corner of my bedroom.

"You see Tiana?! Once I find that ama that stole my Kenchan, and take on ultimate revenge, my life will be complete! I will no longer be doomed to this feeling of insecurity and depression!" She raised one hand in a triumphant fist, and she seemed filled with a new determination.

I was quite startled. "Ultim- Ultimate Revenge?!" I asked quietly and nervously as her grip loosened on my wrist.

"Yes!"

"Even if that.. uh.. ama was one of your friends?"

"YES!"

"Even if that ama... was... me?"

"You?! Your the one who stole my Kenchan?" She paused, and a look of astonishment spread across her face. She looked down like she was in deep thought, then muttered,  
"Tiana. You stole Kenchan."

I smiled a nervous, uneasy smile and responded "Yes?"

She looked up at me smiling. It wasn't a happy smile, but a sick, sort of insane smile that only the maniacs on TV possessed.  
"You stole Ken."  
With that she raised one fist and sent it hurdling towards my face.

I closed my eyes shut waiting for the impact to come, but something stopped her.

"That would be my girlfriend... Miyako."

I peeked my eyes open. There Ken was, holding back Miyako's arm.

"Kenchan?!" She said, turning slowly around to see her beloved in person.

"Kenchan? What?" Ken said, with a confused look across his face.

"Kenchan! I knew that you loved me!" Miyako squealed, eyes flooding with tears.

Ken stepped back un-easily. "I don't love you! What gave you that idea?!"

"When we got married in the show!!"

"WE'RE ACTORS, MIYAKO! TV IS NOT REAL LIFE! IT WASN'T EVEN US! IT WAS THE ACTORS WHO PLAYED US WHEN WE WERE OLDER!"

"It can if you believe it!"

"No, Miyako. It's not real. I never EVER liked you, and I counted the days that you would get fired." Ken said, taking his place by my side.

"Ken..?" I said quietly, trailing off at the end.

"Yes, Tianako?" he said, placing a firm grip on my shoulder.

"Is she going to kill us?"

"Hopefully not. For the love of god not," he whispered nervously.

Miyako had been staring at the spot Ken was standing in as if she were trying to soak it all in. Then a look on her face told us that she couldn't handle it.

"3... 2... 1. RUN!" Ken shouted as Miyako turned towards them. 

He pushed me along, out the door and into the living room.

"Oh, hi, kids! Play nice, Ok?" my mom called, grinning as Ken and I ran out the door, followed by Miyako.

Miyako grabbed my mom's dicing knife from the counter as she chased us out the door.

"YOU WANT TO CHEAT ON ME?! WELL! FINE THEN, KEN! CHEAT ALL YOU WANT! BECAUSE YOU ONLY HAVE 10 MORE MINUTES TO LIVE!" she screamed.

We were running down the hall, and down the stairs, turning as many corners as possible. We finally made it out the door.  
We stopped, panting.

"You... think... we... lost... her?" I breathed.

"Not... quite... yet..." He responded, turning sharply around, hearing the sound of the door behind us opening. "LET'S GO!" He grabbed my arm and led me to the nearest police box. "OFFICER! THERES A HOMICIDAL, PURPLE HAIRED, CRAZY CHICK AFTER US!!" Ken yelled, placing his hands firmly on the counter top.

"Oh." The officer sighed, stuffing the rest of the ame (lollipop) he was sucking on in his mouth. "All right." The officer stood and straightened up his belt. "Where is she?"

"She was right behind us! I swear it!" I cried, pointing towards the door.

The officer stepped out the door as I directed.

Miyako stood next to the entrance, twirling the knife in her hands. "Officer? Have you seen a handsome blue-haired boy and his magenta-haired girlfriend?" she asked sweetly.

"Yes. Are you a homicidal, purple haired, crazy chick? Or are you just a sweet, little angel?"

"A little from column A, a little from column B!" Miyako smiled. "Oh, Uncle Bernie! You know that I want to kill Ken Ichijouji as fast as possible!"

"HE'S her UNCLE?!" I said in dis-belief.

Ken wore the same look I did, and we both sidled out the door without them noticing.

Miyako saw us out of the corner of her now gleaming red eyes as we began to walk away.  
"I've got to go! I. Must. Kill."  
She walked after us slowly, but steadily getting faster till she reached a light jog.

I noticed her behind us and we began to sprint away.  
Her pace quickened till she was at out heels, raising the knife high above our backs when suddenly-  
she tripped. Tripped and fell into a sewer.  
Drowning with the rats off of which she fed.  
We never saw her again. 


End file.
